"Why don't you write more happy songs?"

Because life sucks that's why. Ask any writer. We write from experience. Has my life been a bevy of shit, more shit with a side of shit and shit to drink (no ice)? Of course not. I have a lot to be thankful for, a lot to be happy or excited about. But when it comes to writing, it's different. I had a conversation with a good friend of mine the other night about this. Below is the follow-up e-mail I sent her. My attempt at explaining. Enjoy.

Beebs,
I was thinking about what you said the other night about writing more happy songs. I'm a happy person...promise. I think it's just a matter of not being that happy. I'm definitely not writing about "saw you in the club that night...you were lookin' so flyyyy....the way you wore those jeans...you had me hypnotiiiiiized." For one, that's never happened to me, and for two...eww. I have had some very good times relationship-wise, and I've written about those times. I think it's a matter of relatability. Is that a word? Well guess what...I already used it, so HA! Like if I write about all the good times, people will listen and think "wow that guy must've been happy." Sure they will. But then when I write about the bad times it's like "man that shit can not be easy." Plus I think I can go deeper with sad stuff than I can with happy stuff. Easily. And think about the music I compose. Not exactly "I've got a lovely bunch of coconuts" material. I like making dramatic music, and I've never really been dramatically happy or excited. Listen to My Immortal and tell me you don't get sad just listening to it. I think that's the thing about sad music too...even if you haven't gone through that same situation the song can take you exactly to where whoever wrote it was coming from. Can't do that with happy or upbeat songs. I can't feel what it's like to be rich because I listened to a P Diddy song. But I felt Amy Lee. Hopefully someday people will feel me. That's really it. Promise I'll smile more.

Love,
Your Big Brother